


Purple and Black

by idk_what_username_to_use



Category: Big Mouth (Cartoon)
Genre: Agender Character, Self-Acceptance, demi-girl
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:01:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28474344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idk_what_username_to_use/pseuds/idk_what_username_to_use
Summary: Missy connects with a student who understands the issues of not being content with their body (based on the experiences of some of my friends).
Comments: 3
Kudos: 4





	Purple and Black

*It’s not fair, why can’t I have boobs? They don’t even need to be that big, I just want them to at least exist. Luckily I have his hoodie so I can pretend they are there.*

A student who appears to be female comes into class late again. They are wearing a hoodie similar to Missy’s. They sit down a few rows ahead of Missy.

*Huh, I never realized it but that girl also wears hoodies. I wonder if she is also flat chested like me.*

Missy mainly pays attention throughout class but her mind keeps wandering to this student. Missy starts to take in the student’s look. They have medium length black hair which is pulled back into a low ponytail. They are wearing the same brand hoodie as Missy but it was black instead of purple. They are wearing a skirt but are tugging on it like it makes them uncomfortable.

*Does she even choose her wardrobe? She seems comfortable in that hoodie but she keeps tugging and moving her skirt around.*

Once class is over, Missy decides to talk to this student.

“Uh, hi. I don’t think I’ve ever really said anything to you before. I hate to ask but, what’s your name? I normally remember but my brain has been kind of wonkers lately.”

The student looks at Missy, almost examining her, and then says, 

“Hi. I’m Jocelyn.”

Jocelyn says their name like it’s a pain.

“It’s nice to meet you Jocelyn, I’m Missy.”

“Well, it’s cool meeting you Missy but I think I should head to my next class.”

“Oh right, like I said before, my brain has been wonkers and wacky lately.”

“Well, bye Missy.”

Missy watches Jocelyn walk off, she feels like Jocelyn isn’t comfortable. 

*Maybe she’s shy, she barely ever raises her hand in class and she wears the hood of the hoodie most of the time.*

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Later Missy spots Jocelyn again. She has an urge to talk to her, she just needs to know if Jocelyn has the same issues as her. 

*I just need someone who can understand me and relate to me.*

Missy walks to Jocelyn which isn’t difficult because they’re sitting alone. Missy sits down right next to them.

“Hi Jocelyn.”

Jocelyn looks hurt by the name again but hides it with an smirk and says,

“Hi Missy.”

“Can I ask a kind of personal question?”

Jocelyn looks at her as if examining her again.

“Sure.”

“Do you ever feel upset about your body and how it grows?”

“I mean, yeah. All the time.”

*She understands!!! Finally, I won’t be alone.*

“Why do you ask?”

“Well, my boobs don’t really exist. I’m flat chested and it makes me really uncomfortable.”

Jocelyn’s facial expression doesn’t seem to be connecting to what Missy is saying but they keep their smile and nods.

*I thought she said she could relate, what is going on?*

The lunch bell rings before she can figure out what’s going on so she just heads to her class confused.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After classes Missy has soccer. She sees Jocelyn and waves and Jocelyn waves back. When changing, Missy feels uncomfortable taking off her hoodie.

*Why do we have to change? I’m sure I can play soccer in my hoodie and overalls. That would be better than having to have people know what a flat and gross monster I am.*

Missy doesn’t look up at all when headed to the soccer field. When she does look up she sees Jocelyn covering her boobs with her arms. 

*Wait a minute, is Jocelyn even flat chested? How can she be upset at her body when she has boobs?*

Missy avoids Jocelyn the entire practice. But, she does notice Jocelyn slouching a lot and covering their chest. As much as Missy doesn’t want to admit it, she knows that Jocelyn is going through something similar to her.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After changing and leaving the locker room, Missy runs to talk to Jocelyn.

“Hey Jocelyn.”

Jocelyn looks surprised by Missy coming to talk to them.

“I just wanted to say, you seem to be having problems with your body and I want you to know that you can always talk to me.”

“Oh, wow, thanks Missy. Oh, before I forget, what pronouns do you use?”

*What pronouns do I use? Isn’t it pretty obvious, just because I have a flat chest doesn’t mean I’m not a proud and strong female.*

“I use female pronouns, isn’t it obvious?”

“I mean, no. Appearances and even bodies don’t determine your pronouns.”

“I know about that I just think it’s always pretty clear.”

“Well actually, it isn’t.”  
“It feels like there is something you’re not telling me.”

Jocelyn turns red and starts to walk away.

“Nope. I’m not hiding anything. How could you even say that? Ugh”

*She is hiding something, I feel it. Maybe she’s lesbian or bi and doesn’t want to tell me.*

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next day Missy feels bad.

*I probably shouldn’t have assumed Jocelyn is hiding something, she probably isn’t. Not only am I gross and flat, but I’m also really mean.*

Missy makes it her mission to apologize to Jocelyn. When she sees Jocelyn she immediately runs to her.

“Jocelyn!”

Jocelyn seems surprised and confused (and still a bit angry).

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed you’re hiding something, it’s really wrong of me to assume that.”

“Missy, can I tell you something?”

Jocelyn is looking vulnerable and almost lonely.

“Ofcourse, you can tell me anything”

Jocelyn starts pacing back and forth.

“You know, we need to head to class, I can tell you about it later.”

*Is she trying to make excuses for not telling me something?*

Missy normally never does this but she says 

“It would be fine if we miss class, this seems important.”

Jocelyn seems to be panicking so Missy decides to calm them down.  
“Hey, it’s okay. It’s probably scary for you but here, I’ll tell you something and then you might feel more comfortable. Is that okay with you?”

Jocelyn nods.

“Okay well, I often feel like I’m never going to be as pretty as other girls and that I’ll always just be the smart one. Which is important but, I also want to be pretty and it feels unfair that some people get to be both. Okay well, you’re turn.”

“Um, well, how do I put this…”

“Remember, you can tell me anything.”

“Well, I’m not, I’m not fully, I’m not a true, I’m not female.”

*She’s not, female? Is she trans?*

“Are you trans?”

“I’m not sure, I don’t think so. I think I might be agender or demi-girl.”

“What? I’m sorry I just don’t know what those are.”

“Well, agender is when you don’t really have a gender that fits you and demi girl is when you’re part female part something else.”

“I hate to ask but, which are you?”

“I’m, I’m not sure. I’m still figuring it out and I just don’t need people thinking about me being female because I know I’m not.”

“Wow-za that’s a lot of information.”

“Yeah, I’m sorry Missy. You probably think I’m a freak or something.”

“I don’t think you’re a freak.”

“Well, do you think I need to identify as agender or demi girl right now?”

“No! You figure it out when you figure it out, you can’t control it. And, regarding pronouns…”

“I want to use they/them pronouns.”

“Okay.”

“Also, I know this might be asking for a lot but, could you not call me Jocelyn? It makes me feel trapped and stuck under this label of female.”

“Okay, can I call you Firefly?”

Firefly laughs.

“Sure, it sounds cool and is kind of gender neutral.”

“Also it has Nathan Fillion in it.”

“I’m guessing you’re a Nathan Fillion fan?”

“You’ve guessed correctly. Hey wait, why did you say you feel uncomfortable in your body?”

“Well, the boobs and the vagina don’t express my gender, my real gender. Honestly, I wish I was completely flat.”

“Do you want to switch bodies like in that movie where they switch bodies?”

“I know you’re probably talking about Freaky Friday but all I can think about is when that happens in Jessie.”

Firefly and Missy laugh and even though they get busted by Caleb for skipping class, they both know it was worth it.


End file.
